
“Punt” is
not a dirty word
Sometimes
all we can do is salvage a situation and
move on
by
Corbie Mitleid
We in the US have a saying: When in doubt, punt. Punt in this
case is neither the little British boat nor a reference to gambling.
In US football, it’s when standard running plays aren’t going
to work. So you punt – drop the ball and kick it as far as you
can. In general terms, it means make the best of a situation, and don’t
worry about not getting the Big Play this time ‘round.
You see,
this actually wasn’t the essay I planned
to work on this week. I tried everything,
pushing doggedly to get the message to translate
from head to heart to hand to pen. But the
words wouldn’t flow. The essay sat
there as sullen as Oswald, my big brown Maine
Coon, when he can’t find a moth to
chase. He insists that there will be
one to play with if he waits by the door
long enough. Never mind that it’s windy
and wet and they’re tucked up under
nice dry leaves. Forget the fact that if
he’d give up on the moth hunt for the
moment, there are warm laps and tummy rubs
and a handful of kitty treats waiting for
him. He knows better. Don’t
distract him. And if the essay was immovable,
I was inflexible right back. I insisted on
wrestling with this single concept, pulling
words out of my brain like recalcitrant taffy,
because I did not want to let it “win.”
Finally,
I got smart.
I brought
my focus back to the moment, the Big Picture.
What did I truly want? To finish a good
essay. What was the best way to do that? Switch
the focus for now to an essay I really felt.
So I shelved the mulish piece without an
ounce of guilt, and went to work on this
one. And – surprise! – it flowed
effortlessly. And writing became fun again
(which is one of my cardinal rules. If there
isn’t joy in the doing, don’t
do it).
By switching
my focus, I avoided functional fixedness.
The phrase was coined by Karl Duncker, a
Gestalt psychologist, in the 1930s. Duncker
defined functional fixedness as
being “a mental block against using
an object in a new way that is required to
solve a problem.” This "block" limits
a person’s ability to use components
to make a specific item, as they can’t
move past the original intention of the object.
Our family
defines it a bit differently. For us, functional
fixedness means you’re entirely consumed
by the details of an idea or mission – so
much so, that the actual reason for doing
it gets lost in the shuffle. You forget to
check if (a) there is another, easier way
around matters or (b) you still need to do
what you’d planned in the first place.
Often, the immediacy of the task (locating
your missing scissors; getting to the gardening
shop; changing the oil in the car) is surpassed
by time and circumstance. You find your scissors
only to see that you could have used a kitchen
knife to cut the ribbon on the wrapping.
You stress out rushing to the gardening shop
and then admit that the weather is unsuitable
for planting for the next week. And you obsess
about doing the oil change even though the
car won’t break down if it goes a few
more days without it.
Remember
the old saying can’t see the forest
for the trees? Turn it inside out for
a new take on “big picture thinking.” Imagine
that you are a fifty foot deity, standing
on a five hundred foot cliff, overlooking
a little village. As you watch the village
day after day, you see the births and the
deaths, the alliances and the squabbles,
the marriages and the divorces. Because you
are literally “over looking” the
situation, you can see the big picture, the
patterns and shifts of the energies. Those
in the village? They are so fixated on the
little details of daily existence that the
big picture insight is often lost.
This idea
of functional fixedness can affect any part
of your life. Think of a time when you were
so busy fighting for your point of view,
or proving yourself right, that eventually
you couldn’t remember what got the
argument started in the first place. How
much time did you waste? Looking back now,
observe whether it was important to get your
point across – win at all costs – or
whether there was a bigger idea that you
wanted to work on. Did that bigger idea get
ignored in the small stuff? Was there a compromise
you could have seen, if you’d been
more objective? Did your fixedness result
in a chain reaction of missed opportunities,
bad temper, or lost direction? Take it further:
how many times have you sabotaged yourself
because you wouldn’t give yourself
a break, allow yourself to be less than perfect,
or admit that what you thought you wanted
was no longer truly on your radar screen?
When we
learn to be fluid instead of fixed, we give
ourselves a far bigger playground of possibility.
When we focus on the intention – which
at core, is always to be happy in and with
a given situation – then we see all
kinds of ways to bring that intention to
fruition. Figuratively standing a situation
on its head gives so many new perspectives
that often they turn out to be more fun and
fulfilling than the original idea whose blockage
frustrates us!
There is
a martial arts concept, called “Soft
Eyes,” which is invaluable in finding
our way out of functional fixedness. Ron
Windle and Suzanne Warren, in their excellent
book Collaborative Problem Solving,
explain it this way:
Soft
eyes happen when we relax the muscles around
our eyes and let ourselves see with our
peripheral vision as well as with our central,
focused vision. We see the individual in
front of us, but we also see the people
to either side, the clock above his head,
the lights on the ceiling and the pattern
on the floor. We take in everything and
are distracted by nothing. Seeing in this
way sends an entirely different set of
signals to the brain from seeing with hard
eyes. As our eyes see more, somehow our
brains become more open to the diversity
of possibilities that always surround us.
Soft eyes also tend to have a calming effect
on the people around us, and often on ourselves
as well.
Let’s
go back to those initial situations of functional
fixedness and look at them from a more
Big Picture point of view.
- That ribbon needs to
be cut. What’s the big thing
you want to do? You want to wrap a
package beautifully. Sure, there’s
ribbon. But what else can you do? Is the
ribbon even necessary?
- You need to get to the
gardening store, but time is tight. What’s
the big thing you want to do? You
want a beautiful garden. What else can
you do at home to prepare for the season,
especially in light of the rainy weather?
Does anyone around you have what you need
that you might borrow? (Perhaps that could
be the start of a community garden with
your neighbor!)
- You want to change the
oil in the car. You always do it yourself
but you don’t have time. What’s
the big thing you want to do? Keep
your car in good condition. When you remember
your intention and look at possibilities,
you remember that you can take it to the
local mechanic for an oil change and leave
it on your lunch hour – and not only
does that get the oil changed, but now
you have the opportunity to experience
an Attitude of Gratitude moment for the
mechanic, his obliging nature and his expertise,
and the extra time you have succeeded in
giving yourself.
As John
Lennon wisely said, “Life is what happens
to you while you're busy making other plans.” It’s
marvelous when things follow our perceived “right
order” and nothing trips us up. But
when the roadblocks occur, or we’re
frustrated in our projects or tasks for whatever
reason, it pays to back up. Assess what the
Real Destination is, and see if there isn’t
another way to get there.
Take some
time this week to listen for how many times
people short-circuit themselves. Watch how
opportunities are seized by those who remain
fluid. Not only Necessity, but Openness is
the mother of invention: the ability to ad
lib in any situation, with ease and non-judgment,
is more valuable than all the memorized game
plans in your head.
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