WHY YOU NEVER HAVE TO
SHOP FOR ANOTHER PRESENT

March is my birthday month. I've always rather liked how hobbits celebrated birthdays in Tolkien's sagas: they throw their own birthday parties and give lots of things away. This got me to thinking about presents in general, and how people often agonize - unnecessarily -- about giving the right things: will the recipient like it? Is it expensive enough/showy enough? Does it make me look like I care, or didn't give it enough thought?

I want to remind you that you have a closet full of gifts, already wrapped and ready to go. They are never untimely, out of season, too big or too small. They are specific gifts that only you can give. And they are gifts to you, as well as to those to whom you give them, because in giving you cannot help but touch your own life with grace. These are what are known as "spiritual gifts." Here are some examples:

Be it visually, vocally or by example, your talent is helping others reach a new level of learning about themselves, the world around them - or the world within. What do you have to teach that is special? Can you give someone a new tool or trade, or spark an interest, by sharing your knowledge? Remember the example of Annie Sullivan and Helen Keller -- Annie's dedication to teaching gave Helen the world after so many years in darkness. You, too, may have wonders to teach. Go find out!

You may have a knack for calling forth the best from others, helping them to be more aware of their own truths and paths, to bolster them up when they are discouraged or downhearted, to challenge them to see and set their life's goals. Try writing letters to those who need encouragement - having concrete words to hold onto in the dark times can be miraculous. Reach out to your elders, to the homebound or those challenged in some way (physically, mentally, emotionally), to young ones who need to know they matter in the world. Help people go beyond where they think they can go. Encouragement builds wings!

It's the number one complaint of most people these days - not enough time. If you have a little extra, or can make some, offer it. Watch a pet so that someone can go away for the weekend. Babysit. Cook an extra casserole and give it to a working mom. Do someone's grocery shopping for them. Even giving someone an extra hour or two can feel like a million dollars when it's time to breathe, to relax, and to get their feet under them again.

This is the gift of those who emanate kindness and compassion, especially to people the world may deem least deserving of it. This is forgiveness flowing throughout life; the giving of comfort to those who grieve or are in crisis; being the peacemaker to help bridge two discordant sides. This gift can flower in many directions, from helping individuals to organizing programs of social needs. The world in which we find ourselves can seem so harsh and unforgiving - using this gift is vital to stem the tide and return gentleness and understanding back into our lives.

Do you find yourself willing to offer assistance or relief from distress wherever it's needed? Then this is your gift. All of us can remember being immersed in an impossible situation, ready to give up - when one person stepped in quietly and unobtrusively, bringing order out of chaos. If this is your ability, then you're onto something precious. Use it to help organize volunteers, assistance projects and social outreach programs, fund-raising. On an individual level, weed a garden for someone whose arthritis no longer allows such work . . . clean out a garage and organize a tag sale for someone who is moving . . . paint someone's living room if they can't use a ladder . . . offer to carpool the local kids even if it's not "your turn." Be that person who pitches in to do whatever needs to be done - no matter how detailed or tedious.

You'll know this is your special gift when you are willing to take responsibility for managing an organization or program, for being in charge of people or things. It involves being able to put things together, tie up loose ends, and get things done. If you have special talents at financing, planning, organizing, problem solving, or delegating responsibilities, offer them to those programs and events that are important to you. Your ability may take a marginal situation and make it a success. A close relative of this gift is . . .

You may be someone who is known for setting a pattern for others, either by direction, instruction, guidance, encouragement or example. If so, your gift is that of inspiring others to reach for what matters. Organizing a group, a fund drive, an event, a study group can all be examples of the gift of leadership. Your gift may bring into fruition something that many people have searched for, but not been able to create themselves.

This is your gift if you resonate with ensuring the comfort of others, or having a knack for making people feel at ease or especially welcome. Sometimes those we think are aloof or unfriendly are hungry for a welcome, but don't know how to ask. Open your door and your heart to these people. Invite someone out to lunch, or for a walk in the park, or to a movie. Or bring together friends or like-minded discoverers in your area on a regular basis. Whether your hospitality takes the form of a welcoming home-space or the ability to include people wherever you go, it's a gift to be cherished beyond measure.

I hope you've noticed that these gifts don't require a special occasion to give - nor does it even require a close relationship with the person to whom you're giving them. But when you're debating whether to buy someone their 5th sweater or 12th pair of earrings . . . when you are standing lost in the middle of a department store because nothing feels right . . . when you look at the calendar and realize someone's special day is fast approaching . . . go to your inner closet and check out those gifts. See if there isn't one that will be just right for your friend. Guaranteed that no matter what you choose to give, your friend won't have "one just like it" - and will cherish it because it's from your heart.